The Declaration

Friends since they were children,

Eliza never once imagined that

their relationship would blossom

into a romantic one.  Franklin

was so handsome and he had

his pick of very beautiful and

accomplished young women.

 

Eliza had always dreaded the

day when he would marry.

Her feelings for him had

changed when she turned

sixteen.  It was hard being

around him and pretending

that he was like a brother to

her.  It was even harder seeing

him with other girls.

 

When she and Franklin went

for their walks, always accompanied by

a relative, she would ask him

questions about a particular girl

to gage his feelings but he always

changed the subject.  She thought

perhaps he had developed an

attachment to the girl but

didn’t want to say anything until

he was sure that his affection

was reciprocated.

 

Then the moment she always dreaded

came.  They were sitting in their favorite

spot under her aunt’s supervision.  It was

a beautiful, sunny day.  Eliza breathed in the air,

smiling as the sun hit her face.  She held a rose in

her hand which Franklin had picked for her.

That was very sweet of him, she thought.

He was always doing thoughtful things.

How she adored him.  Sighing, she turned

to her friend who was watching her.

 

There was curious expression on his face

and she grew concerned.  “Is something the

matter?” she asked.

 

“Over the years I have developed feelings

for someone close to me and I haven’t had

the courage to tell her.  I am not sure of how

she feels about me.  What do you think I should

do?”

 

Eliza blinked, trying hard not to show the pain

that had gripped her heart.  She quickly turned

her head away from him so that he could not

see the tears in her eyes.  She blinked them back.

The last thing she wanted was to break down in

front of him.  He must never know how she felt

about him.  Never.  “I-I think you should tell her,”

she said quietly.  “You won’t know her feelings

unless you declare yours.”

 

There was a moment’s silence and then she

felt Franklin reach for her hand and his

fingers closed round hers.  His hand felt so

warm and strong.  She wanted to pull her hand

away, get up and run from there.  She wanted to

go to her room and lock herself in and cry until

she couldn’t cry anymore.

 

“Eliza, you and I have been friends since child-

hood.  The happiest moments of my life have

been with you.  I can’t imagine being with

anyone else.  Eliza, I love you.”

 

Her head spun round, her eyes wide with

shock.  “What?” she exclaimed.

 

“You’re crying,” he said, brushing the tears

from her cheeks.

 

“You love me?” She couldn’t believe it.

 

“Yes.  I have loved you for a long time

now but dared not declare my feelings

because I didn’t want to run the risk of

ruining our friendship.  You never showed

particular favour to any of the young men

so I hoped that perhaps you might be

more inclined to develop a romantic interest

in a man whom you consider to be your friend.”

 

Eliza beamed through her tears, her heart

bursting with joy.  “Oh Franklin,” she cried.  “I

love you.  I loved you since I was sixteen.  I wanted

so much to tell you but was afraid that you won’t

be pleased.”

 

His eyes were tender as they searched her face.  “Oh

my dear Eliza,” he murmured.  ” We would have

spared each other undue anguish if we had

declared our love before.  Well, the matter has been

resolved.  We love each other and it means now that

I can ask you to marry me without fear of rejection.”

He got down on his knee, his eyes held hers and both

of his hands held hers.  “Eliza, will you do me the honor

of becoming my wife?”

 

Eliza nodded, the tears falling.  “Yes,” she sobbed.

“Oh, Franklin.”

 

He smiled and stood up.  He pulled her to her feet.

“Now, I will go and ask your father for his permission.”

 

“I don’t suspect that you will meet with any resistance,”

Eliza told him.  “My father is rather fond of you.”

 

They walked back to Eliza’s house where Franklin was

warmly received.  Her aunt followed them, dabbing

at her eyes and smiling broadly.

 

Sources:  Angelpig.net; Victorian Era

Driven for Change

All I did was ask for rights. I didn’t attack anyone. I didn’t harass anyone. I didn’t oppose the system or the country or the authority. All I said is, ‘Why can’t I drive?’

I was born and grew up in a country where it was nothing out of the ordinary for women to drive.  My mother drove.  My aunt drove her own car.  And now I live in a country where women drive cars, buses and vans.  Imagine not being about to drive to work, drop your kids off to school or run errands.  This was the reality for women in Saudi Arabia and it was the ban on women driving which drove Manal al-Sharif to help to help start a women’s right to drive campaign in 2011.

Manal was filmed driving a car as part of the campaign.  In May 2011, she was detained and released but was arrested again the following day.  Her arrest helped rather than defeated her cause.  It showed that no matter what the cost, she was determined to stand up for what she believed.

Watch Manal share her story and try to imagine what it would be like to receive death threats because you dared to get behind the wheel of a car and have the video of this posted on Facebook.

In the video Manal declared what the purpose of the campaign was. “This is a volunteer campaign to help the girls of this country [learn to drive]. At least for times of emergency, God forbid. What if whoever is driving them gets a heart attack?” These were valid points.  The other day one of my co-workers had to go leave work for a doctor’s appointment.  Imagine if she were living in Saudi Arabia.  She would have to call her husband to go and pick her up from work, take her to the doctor’s office.  The husband would either have to wait until the appointment was over or if this wasn’t an option, he would have to go back to work and then back to the doctor’s office.  What an inconvenience!

Read this personal experience of a woman who currently lives in Saudi Arabia.  Not being able to drive is just one of the restrictions women face.  Under Saudi law, all females must have a male guardian such a father, brother, husband or son.  Girls and women are forbidden from travelling, conducting official business, or undergoing certain medical procedures without permission from their male guardians.  Depending on the guardian, women may also need permission to marry, divorce, to get an education, get a job or open a bank account.

Mandal is working to have male guardianship annulled.  And I hope that she succeeds.  Women are not children.  They are adults, capable of making their own decisions.  Women and girls should not have to get permission to be educated. Education is a privilege that everyone should have a right to enjoy.  And women should have to right to employment, earning their own money and opening a bank account where they can deposit their earnings.

There as some women, however, who defend male guardianship.  One such woman was Noura Abdulrahman, a female employee of the Saudi Ministry of Education. In a 2010 interview with the New York Times, she declared that male guardianship provided protection and love.  

In Saudi culture, women have their integrity and a special life that is separate from men. As a Saudi woman, I demand to have a guardian. My work requires me to go to different regions of Saudi Arabia, and during my business trips I always bring my husband or my brother. They ask nothing in return—they only want to be with me.

The image in the West is that we are dominated by men, but they always forget the aspect of love. People who aren’t familiar with Shariah often have the wrong idea. If you want stability and safety in your life, if you want a husband who takes care of you, you won’t find it except in Islam.

Men can love and protect women without taking away their rights to be independent, free-thinking individuals who should be treated as equals.  God created women in His image and never intended them to be treated as second class citizens with no rights.  Opponents of male guardianship cite cases in which women’s careers were ended by their guardians or they lost their children due to a lack of custody rights.  In 2009, there was the case of a father who vetoed several of his daughter’s attempts to marry outside their tribe and punished her by sending her to a mental institution.  Activist Wajeha Al-Huwaider agrees that while most Saudi men are caring, “it’s the same kind of feeling they have for handicapped people or for animals. The kindness comes from pity, from lack of respect.” She compares male guardianship to slavery.

The ownership of a woman is passed from one man to another. Ownership of the woman is passed from the father or the brother to another man, the husband. The woman is merely a piece of merchandise, which is passed over to someone else—her guardian … Ultimately, I think women are greatly feared. When I compare the Saudi man with other Arab men, I can say that the Saudi is the only man who could not compete with the woman. He could not compete, so what did he do with her? … The woman has capabilities. When women study, they compete with the men for jobs. All jobs are open to men. 90% of them are open to men. You do not feel any competition … If you do not face competition from the Saudi woman … you have the entire scene for yourself. All positions and jobs are reserved for you. Therefore, you are a spoiled and self-indulged man – Wajeha Al-Huwaider

Notes to Women would like to recognize Manal, a fearless woman who is continuing to fight for the rights of Saudi women. She remains an active critic of the Saudi government.  She started a Twitter campaign called “Faraj” to release Saudi, Filipino and Indonesian women prisoners in the Dammam women’s prison who “are locked up just because they owe a small sum of money but cannot afford to pay the debt”.  She tweeted about the lack of elections for the Shura Council, and the murder of Lama al-Ghamdi.  Her work has been recognized by Foreign Policy, Time, and the Oslo Freedom Forum.  Hers is a voice that refuses to be silenced until there is change.

Today, let us stand with Manal and the women of Saudi Arabia.  Let us take action.  Let us raise our voices and call for change.  And let us be thankful that we live in countries where we have access to education, employment, our own bank accounts and have a say in matters that concern us.

We won’t stop until the first Saudi license is issued to a woman.

When women break that taboo and they’re not afraid to drive that car by herself – that’s it. Now she has the guts to speak up for herself and take action.

Women tell me they are different since 21 May – the day I was arrested – it’s a positive change, they believe now.

Sources:  Wikipedia; TED; Brainy Quotes; Women’s Rights