Come Clean

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Photo by Vitória Santos from Pexels

How long will you continue to live in denial?

How long will you pretend that you love your husband when you can’t even stand to have him touch you?

How long will you be able to hide your dislike and disgust for him?

How long will you tell your lover that you will leave your husband for him?

How long much longer can you live like this?

Don’t you think it’s time for you to come clean?

77 Words

 

This is for the Weekend Writing Prompt by Sammi Cox. For instructions, click Here.

Making Plans

Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go into this city, spend a year there, buy and sell, and make a profit,” whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? It is just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away. Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that.” But now you are rejoicing in your boastings. All such rejoicing is evil. Therefore, to him who knows to do good and does not do it, it is sin – James 4:13-16

How many of us make plans way ahead in the future? And how many of those plans end up going nowhere? Why does the Bible liken making plans to boasting? It could be because we are doing so without consulting God. We act as if we are in control of our destiny when He is the One who is. As Christians, we should make our plans based on what God wants or think is best not what we want. He may have much better plans for us. Take the prophet Jeremiah. What would have happened if he had made plans for a career, travel or marriage? Those plans would have come to nothing because God already had plans for his life.

Remember the Tower of Babel? The people had the bright idea of building a tower so high that it would reach heaven. What were their reasons for building the tower? “…let us make a name for ourselves, lest we be scattered abroad over the face of the whole earth” (Genesis 11:4). They wanted to stay put instead of going abroad and populating the earth. In other words, they were making their own plans which were outside of God’s will. They were boastful in thinking that they could do things their way instead of God’s way.

Nothing is wrong with having plans but they must never be contrary to God’s will. To them, it seemed reasonable to stay where they were and build up a city instead of going out into the world to start new lives. There are times when we want to stay put but God wants us to step out in faith as He did with Abraham. And there are times when we want to go places but He wants us to stay put like Jeremiah. We have to be attuned to what God wants for us so that our plans will line up nicely with His perfect will for us.

It is always best to say, “if the Lord wills…” when it comes to making plans. Wouldn’t you feel better knowing that God approves of your plans and will bless them?

The Reunion

PHOTO PROMPT © Carla Bicomong

Bob and Carol watched as thousands of lanterns floated across the calm sea.  While honeymooning, they heard about Hawaii’s annual Memorial Day celebration honoring loved ones who died while serving in the military.

While Bob videotaped the event, Carol lit her lantern and cast it off.  It was in memory of her brother, Dave who was killed by a roadside bomb in Afghanistan.  As she watched the lantern drift away, she was comforted by these words, “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in Me, though he may die, he shall live.”  What reunion that would be.

100 Words

Written as part of the Friday Fictioneers challenge hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields For more details, visit Here.   To read other stories based on this week’s prompt, visit Here.

Sources:  Huffington Post; Bible Gateway

 

Angry With God

Don’t you just love it when your child decides to have a temper tantrum when you’re in the supermarket, a restaurant or anywhere in public?  Some of us feel embarrassed and mortified, especially when we get those “why can’t she control her child?” looks.  We try to deal with the situation as best as we can.  Wouldn’t it be great if we could vacate the premises as fast as the superhero, Flash?  Or better yet, beam home?  When it comes to dealing with temper tantrums, we have to diffuse the situation and try to remain calm while doing that which isn’t easy at all.

What about us?  Do we throw temper tantrums when we don’t get our way with God?  Do we get angry and sulky when He doesn’t answer our prayers the way we want?  I can think of two examples of people in the Bible who threw tantrums when things didn’t go their way.  The first is Cain.

Cain was the older of two brothers.  He was a a “tiller of the ground” while his brother Abel was a “keeper of sheep”.  Both brought offerings to God.   God respected Abel and his offering but didn’t respect Cain and his offering.  Cain became very angry and depressed.   Why did God reject his offering?  Hebrews 11:4 states, By faith Abel offered to God a more excellent sacrifice than Cain, through which he obtained witness that he was righteous, God testifying of his gifts; and through it he being dead still speaks.  Abel offered the best that he had from among his flock while Cain brought an offering of the fruit.  It doesn’t say that the fruit were the first fruits of the ground which were offered unto God just as the first-born of man and animals but it would explain why God rejected Cain’s offer. 

If we don’t give God our best and He rejects it, why should we get angry?  Cain’s anger toward God was unreasonable.  God spoke to him about it.   “Why are you angry? Why is your countenance fallen?  If you do well, shall you not be accepted? But if you do not do well, sin is crouching at the door. It desires to dominate you, but you must rule over it.”

God dealt with Cain’s behavior in a calm and loving manner.  God knew what was the cause of his anger and told him what to do about it.  If you know why your child is acting up, try to help them to see how their behavior will not get them what they want.  Cain’s anger was not going to make things right with God.  He had to change his attitude and do what is right before God could accept him.  Your child needs to know that their unruly behavior is unacceptable and that if they behave themselves, all will be well for them.   Some of them may calm down and behave themselves while others continue acting up.  Sadly, Cain didn’t get over his anger and it resulted in his brother’s death.

Jonah is the other adult in the Bible who threw a temper tantrum.  When God first sent the prophet to the wicked city of Nineveh to cry out against it, “because their wickedness has come up before Me,” Jonah fled in the opposite direction to Tarshish.  After surviving three days and nights in the belly of a large fish which vomited him up on dry land and acknowledging that “Salvation is of the Lord!” God again called the prophet to “Get up, go to Nineveh, the great city, and proclaim to it the message that I tell you.”

Jonah had no other choice but to go to Nineveh this time.  When he entered the city, he cried out, “In forty days’ time, Nineveh will be overthrown!”  The people believed God and proclaimed a fast.  They all put on sackcloth and when the king heard the news, he left his throne, removed his robes and put on sackcloth.  He made a decree that both people and animals would fast and that all shall turn from their evil ways and from the violence that is in their hands, believing that it was possible that God “may relent and change His mind. He may turn from His fierce anger, so that we will not perish.”

When God saw their actions and that they had turned from their evil ways, He relented and didn’t bring disaster on them.  However, this act of mercy greatly angered Jonah and he told God why he fled to Tarshish.  “This is the reason that I fled before to Tarshish, because I knew that You are a gracious God and merciful, slow to anger, abundant in faithfulness, and ready to relent from punishment.”  He asked God to take his life because death was better than living to see the people of Nineveh spared. 

Do we get upset with God when He shows love and compassion toward people we don’t think are deserving of His mercy?  Are any of us deserving of His grace?  When Jonah was thrown into the sea as per his request to the men in the ship with him, God showed him mercy by sending a large fish to swallow him, preventing him from drowning.  Jonah confessed that salvation was of the Lord and yet, he was angry with Him for saving the people of Nineveh who repented.  God will not destroy those who repent but will show them mercy instead.  This was the God whom Jonah served and yet, this was the reason why he was angry with Him.

As He did with Cain and with us, God tried to reason with Jonah, showing him how unreasonable he was being.  He asked him, “Is it right for you to be angry?”

Is it right for us to be angry when God accepts a person whom we considered to be a backslider back into His fold?  Was it right for the brother of the prodigal son to be upset with the father for welcoming his wayward son back home?  To illustrate His point, God did a little experiment.  As Jonah sat down to see what would happen to the city of Nineveh, God had a plant grow and give shade to the prophet.  Jonah was thankful for the plant because of its shade from the heat.  The next day, though, God had a worm eat the plant until it withered and then raised up a scorching east wind. When the sun beat upon the head of Jonah he became faint and asked that he might die. He said, “It is better for me to die than to live.”

God asked him if it was right for him to be angry about the plant.  Jonah replied that his anger was justified even to death.  And God’s response was, “You are troubled about the plant for which you did not labor and did not grow. It came up in a night and perished in a night.  Should I not, therefore, be concerned about Nineveh, that great city, in which there are more than a hundred and twenty thousand people, who do not know their right hand from their left, and also many animals?”

Do we, like Jonah, place more importance on things and animals than we do people who are lost and need God’s mercy?  The people of Nineveh were living in sin until God sent Jonah to warn them so that they could turn from their wickedness and be saved.  There are many people in the world who are living in darkness and God wants bring them into the light.  We don’t determine who deserves His mercy and who doesn’t.  When it comes to someone’s salvation, there’s no room for temper tantrums but a changed heart and attitude that would allow us to see what God sees and rejoice with Him when that sinner repents.

Sources:  Bible Study Tools; Bible Gateway

Partakers

The sun meets not the springing bud that stretches towards him with half the certainty that God, the source of all good, communicates himself to the soul that longs to partake of him — William Law

True peace comes not from the absence of trouble, but from the presence of God and will be deep and passing all understanding in the exact measure in which we live in and partake of the love of God – Alexander MacLaren

Great reservoirs of spiritual water, called scriptures, have been provided in this day and have been safeguarded that all might partake and be spiritually fed. The purest word of God, and that least apt to be polluted, is that which comes from the lips of the living prophets who are set up to guide Israel in our own day and time – Harold B. Lee

Beloved, do not think it strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened to you;  but rejoice to the extent that you partake of Christ’s sufferings, that when His glory is revealed, you may also be glad with exceeding joy – 1 Peter 4:12, 13

The Betrayal

Althea closed her Bible and placed it back on the coffee table.  She felt like Judas because she had betrayed Tyson.  Guilt racked her but if she were brutally honest with herself she would admit that what happened between Greg and her was something she had wanted for a very long time–even before she started dating Tyson.

Last night when Greg took her home after working together over time on a pending project, she invited him in to have a hot chocolate.  After he went in and she closed the door, she unbuttoned her coat, with her back to him.  She felt him pull it off her shoulders, discard it then, he pulled her back against him, so that she could feel his hard body pressing into hers while he buried his face in her hair.  She closed her eyes as desire raged through her.  Then, she turned to him, her eyes meeting his in a steady stare.  She reached out and unbuttoned his coat.

His coat was soon disposed of, his tie followed and then, with trembling fingers, she loosened the buttons on his shirt, her heart pounding with anticipation.  She could feel his warm breath on her temple and soon he was shirtless.  Eagerly she ran her hands over his chest and before reaching up and pulling his head down to hers, her fingers gripping his hair as their lips fastened.  His arms went about her waist, pressing her into him as they exchanged passionate kisses.

Several minutes later, Althea drew back, gasping for breath as she dragged off her jacket and everything from the waist up, longing to feel his skin against her.  Greg groaned as she pressed against him, her eyes feverish as they met his smoldering ones and he swept her up into his arms and carried her into the living-room.  They made love on the sofa.  He ended up spending the night and the following morning, they made love again before he left after having breakfast.

Running her hand over the cushion where his head was, she trembled as she recalled how explosive the lovemaking was and it was something she had never experienced with anyone–not even Tyson.  Greg excited her like no man ever did and she wanted to be with him again.  She wasn’t satisfied with having just a working relationship with him.  She wanted more…but what about Tyson?

How could she face Tyson after what she did but how could she stay with him when she wanted Greg?  And what about Greg’s girlfriend, Audrey?  She had completely forgotten about her.  She remembered the first time she met the willowy blonde and her jealous reaction.  It was at one of the company’s picnics.  She was there with Tyson and Greg was there with Audrey.  They were sitting at the table with the director of the company and his wife.  Tyson and she joined them.  She was sitting between Tyson and Greg who introduced them to Audrey.  He and Tyson had met before.

Audrey was what most people would consider to be classically beautiful with her fine features. She was regal and elegant.  When she was introduced to Tyson, she smiled and was very gracious to him but when she was introduced to Althea, she was a bit aloof and the smile on her lips didn’t reach her light blue eyes.  The two women barely said anything to each other and Greg commented on that when they were in the office.  “I couldn’t help but notice that you and Audrey didn’t hit it off.  You’re usually get along with everyone and Audrey too but somehow, you two didn’t warm up to each other.  How come?”

Althea had shrugged and offered him an offhand explanation.  “I guess we can’t always get along with people.”  She couldn’t let him know that she was jealous of Audrey and for some reason Audrey didn’t like her.  Perhaps she sensed that Althea was attracted to her boyfriend.  Women were more intuitive when it came to those things.

“Tyson and I get along even though he’s your boyfriend,” Greg had remarked and she looked at him, quizzically.  His expression was inscrutable.  What does he mean by that? Before she could ask him, his cell rang and he excused himself.  Ever since then, she had been meaning to ask him about the remark but just hadn’t gotten around to it.

The ringing of her phone brought her back to the present and she got up from the sofa to answer it.  It was Tyson.  Heart thudding and hand gripping the phone, she said, “Hello, Tyson.”

“Hi Baby, I tried to get you last night but your machine came on and your cell was turned off.  I thought about coming over but I didn’t want to drop by just like that.”

Well, it’s a good thing you didn’t, she thought.  Or you would have caught me with Greg.  “Tyson, I’m fine.  I was wiped so I must have been sleeping and that’s why I didn’t hear the phone or the cell ring.”  Lying came so easily to her that it startled her.

“Okay.  I called to remind you that we’re going to the Blue Note tonight to see the John Scofield Quartet.  I’ll pick you up at seven.”

She had totally forgotten about tonight.  The last thing she wanted was to be at a jazz club but what excuse could she give?  “All right.”

“Great!  Oh, I invited Greg and Audrey to join us.  I hope you don’t mind.”

Her heart was racing now.  She was going to see Greg.  And Audrey was going to be there.  How was she going to be able to hide her feelings or stop the images of Greg and her making love from popping into her head?  “I wish Audrey weren’t coming,” she said.  “The woman doesn’t like me.”

“Maybe she’s jealous of you,” Tyson remarked.

Althea stiffened.  “Why should she be?” she asked warily.

“You are a gorgeous woman, Althea and you work closely with Greg.  I would be jealous too if I didn’t trust you.”

She closed her eyes as the guilt consumed her.  He trusts me.  I feel like a traitor.  What am I going to do?  I never meant to cheat on him but my feelings for Greg got the better of me.  I was a fool to have a relationship with Tyson when I really wanted to be with Greg but at the time Greg was already seeing Audrey.  Oh, what a mess I have gotten myself into…

“Althea?  Are you still there?”

“Yes–yes.  I–I have to go now.”

“All right.  I’ll see you at seven.”

“See you then,” she replied and hung up, her head throbbing.  She went back over to the sofa and sank heavily down, her brow knitted, frantic about how the evening was going to pan out and that she might do or say something to give herself away.  “Dear Lord, please help me to keep it together tonight,” she begged.

Several hours later when Tyson picked her up, she was composed or appeared to be.  The closer they got to the Blue Note Jazz club, the more nervous she became and by the time they walked into the place, her palms were sweaty and her legs felt like jelly.  Thankfully, Greg and Audrey weren’t there as yet.  It gave her time to collect herself.

It was a nice club.  The atmosphere was casual and intimate.  Their table was situated in such a way that all four of them would be able to get to see the band.   The band had already set up and in ten minutes they were going to play.  She looked up just then and her heart somersaulted when she saw Greg and Audrey approaching their table.  Audrey was wearing a red top with a black pants.  Her hair was pulled back in a chignon giving her an elegant look.  She gave Althea a frosty smile and greeting before she sat down opposite her.

Althea’s eyes shifted to Greg as he sat down beside Audrey and opposite Tyson.  He was dressed in a black dress shirt with black jeans.  He looked so sexy that it was hard for her not to stare.  Their eyes met and she smiled nervously as she greeted him, acting as if they hadn’t seen each other since yesterday at the office.

They ordered drinks, appetizers and dinner and settled down to enjoy the band which was starting up.  As the sounds of jazz filled the air, Althea sneaked a peek at Greg whose head was turned toward the stage and her heart skipped a beat when she caught him looking at her.  She quickly turned away and tried to concentrate on the music and enjoy the dinner but she could feel his eyes on her.

After dinner and during a break, Audrey excused herself and went to the washroom while Tyson went to the bar to order a Club Soda.  Althea had passed on having anything else to drink and was nursing her Cranberry Juice.  Alone with Greg, she couldn’t resist looking at him and her mouth went dry when she saw him looking at her intently.  “You look amazing,” he told her.  “I can’t keep my eyes off you.”

She was wearing a black dress with spaghetti straps and her hair was pulled back at the nape.  “Thank you,” she replied, feeling shy and thrilled at the same time.  “You look incredibly sexy.”

“Althea, I can’t stop thinking about last night and this morning.”

“Me neither,” she confessed.  “What are we going to do?  I feel like such a traitor because Tyson trusts me but I can’t help how I feel about you, Greg.  What happened between us last night and this morning happened because I wanted it to.”

“We have to tell them,” he told her.  “We can’t continue hiding our feelings and pretending that we are happy in our relationships when we’re not.  I want to be with you, Althea.  I’ve wanted it ever since we started working together.”

She stared at him.  “Why didn’t you tell me this before I started dating Tyson?” she demanded.  “I only went out with him because you were with Audrey.”

“I thought you loved Tyson and that’s why I didn’t do anything.  You have no idea how hard it is for me to see you with him.  I like him and we get along but I’m jealous of him because he’s your boyfriend.”

“And I’m jealous of Audrey because she’s your girlfriend.”

“I think she suspects that I have feelings for you.  She didn’t want to come tonight because of you but I managed to talk her into it.  I came because I wanted to see you.  Can I come over later?”

“Yes,” she said.  “We’ll talk more later.” Just then, both Tyson and Audrey joined them.

The band came back and played for another hour.  It was time to leave.  The four of them walked out of the club and to the parking lot.  They said their goodnight and parted.  As Althea walked to Tyson’s Land Rover, she watched Greg and Audrey walk to his Jaguar.  Seeing them together made her decide that she was going to end her relationship with Tyson.  She wouldn’t do it tonight, though.  Tomorrow was Sunday.  On her way to church, she would call him and suggest that they meet in the afternoon at Bryant Park.

It was after ten when she got home and she quickly undressed and took a shower.  She changed into floral print Chemise which flattered her figure and complexion.  Her hair was loose about her shoulders and after dabbing a little of her favorite Ralph Lauren perfume behind her ears, she went into the kitchen.  She just finished pouring hot toddies into two glass cups when the doorbell rang.  Her heart racing, she hurried to answer the door, smiling when she saw Greg’s eyes travel over her.

As soon as she closed the door and locked it, he pulled her into his arms.  “I’ve wanted to do this all night,” he murmured, his eyes restless on her upturned face.  He was wearing a navy blue shirt and blue jeans.  His hair was slightly damp and he smelled really good.

She put her arms around his neck.  “I fixed us some hot toddies.  Let’s sit on the sofa and drink them before they get cold and then…”

He smiled and released her.  “You’re right.  If I kiss you now, I wouldn’t be able to stop.”

They walked into the living-room and while he relaxed on the sofa, she went and got the hot toddies.  She handed him his before she settled down next to him.  She reached for the remote for the stereo and turned it on.  Smooth jazz played in the background.  “I am going to break up with Tyson tomorrow,” she announced quietly.  “I’m going to do it in the park.  I read that a lot of couples call it quits in a park because it’s a public place so not much drama there and it’s quiet and relaxing.  I will call him in the morning to arrange a time when we will meet.  I’m not looking forward to it at all.”

Greg sighed.  “I know what you mean,” he said.  “I broke up with Audrey tonight and it was terrible.  She was hurt and angry.  After she screamed at me and slapped me in the face, she stormed out of the car, slamming the door so hard, I thought the window would break.  I felt like a jerk.  I never meant to hurt her but I should never have gotten involved with her when it was you I wanted to be with.  That was unfair to her.”

“Does she know about us?”

He nodded.  “I didn’t have to tell her.  She figured it out and I couldn’t deny it.”

Althea pursed her lips.  “She must really hate me now.”

“I feel really badly about Tyson.  He’s a really nice guy.  Under other circumstances, we could have been good friends.”

“When he asked me to go out with him I should have turned him down.  It would have been the decent thing to do.  And now, what I have to say to him tomorrow will break his heart and completely destroy his trust in me…” Her voice trembled and tears came to her eyes.

Greg took her toddy and put it and his down on the coffee table.  He put his arm around her shoulder and she rested her head against him.  “I know that you feel badly about Tyson.  Breaking up with someone is never easy.  It can be very painful.  All I can say is that Tyson and Audrey deserve to be with people who will love them in return.”

“You’re right,” she said and brushing the tears away she drew back to look at him. “You and I never meant to hurt them but we can’t help the way we feel about each other.”

His eyes darkened on her face.  “I love you, Althea,” he murmured huskily.  “I have loved you since the first time we met.  I tried to fight it because of Audrey but it was no use.  And those nights when we worked overtime, were torture.  It was hard not to touch you.  Last night my feelings were too strong to ignore.  I wanted you so much.”

“I love you too, Greg.  I fell in love with you the first time I saw you but I didn’t do anything about it because I found out from Krystal that you had a girlfriend.  Seeing you everyday and working late with you was bittersweet.  It wasn’t easy hiding my feelings for you or coming home to this apartment which felt empty and thinking about you, wishing you were here.  You have no idea how often I have fantasized about you and…” her words were smothered against his lips.

The next afternoon, she met Tyson in the park.  Dread filled her as they walked to a bench in a quiet area and sat down.  Taking a deep breath, she repeated the words she had rehearsed on the drive over.  By the time she was finished, he was livid.  “So, when I called you on Friday night and yesterday morning, Greg was there with you?”

“Yes.”

“So, he spent the night.”

“Yes.”

“I don’t believe this.  When I asked you why you didn’t answer my calls you lied to me.  You told me that you were sleeping but the truth is you and he were doing it on the sofa.  Oh, hell, Althea, I trusted you and you betrayed me.” He jumped to his feet.

“Tyson, I’m so sorry–” she said, rising from the bench.

“I don’t want to hear you say you’re sorry.  You know I had many opportunities to cheat on you too but I couldn’t because I cared about you and besides, when I’m in a relationship I don’t cheat. Last night when we were at the Blue Note having a good time, not once did I suspect that there was anything going on between Greg and you.  But Audrey knew something and that’s why she didn’t like you.  She saw you for the liar and cheat you are.  I’m going to leave now before I say something I will regret.” He looked her over with an expression of disgust on his face before he turned and walked away.

She watched him go and then sat back down on the bench. She sat there for a long time, feeling awful that she had hurt someone so badly. Tyson was a terrific guy who didn’t deserve what she had done to him. She couldn’t blame him if he never forgave her.

After leaving the park, she went straight to Greg’s place.  As soon as he closed the door behind her and turned to face her, she went straight into his arms and clung to him.  “It’s over between Tyson and me.”

He held her tightly.  “It’s better to end the relationship than to continue cheating,” he said.  “We don’t have to sneak around.  We can love each other in the open.”

She drew back to look up at him.  “You’re right,” she agreed.

He bent his head and kissed her, thinking of Bill Russell’s quote: “To love someone is nothing, to be loved by someone is something, but to be loved by the one you love is everything”

business woman

 

Sources:  Timeout; Pinterest

The Plane Ride

He sat there on the plane, the open magazine on his lap, his head resting against the back of the seat and his face turned towards the window, watching the clouds and knowing that the distance between Natalie and him was getting wider.  He closed his eyes in despair.  Walking away from her was the most painful and hardest thing he had ever done in his life but things couldn’t continue as they were.  He had to end their relationship.

After a night of torrid lovemaking, he woke up very early the next day and quickly got dressed while she was still sleeping.  He wrote a note for her and left it propped up against the lamp on the bedside table next to her.  He stood for several minutes staring down at her, longing to bend down and kiss her bare shoulder but was afraid that he would wake her.

He tiptoed to the door and slowly opened it.  He stepped into the hall and closed the door behind him.  The place was silent except for the clock ticking and the sound of his heavy breathing as he fought the temptation to turn around and climb back into bed with her.  Once he was outside of the flat, he released a shaky breath and hastily headed for the lift.  In his car, he told himself that he was doing the right thing even though his heart felt heavy.  He went home, packed his bags and booked the next available flight out of Detroit and heading to London.  It was an impromptu vacation.  He couldn’t be in Detroit right then or his resolve would crumble.  He hoped that the distance would somehow ease the pain and that being with his family would help as well.

So, here he was on the plane heading for London.  He wondered if she had read the note and how she was taking the news.  He remembered every word he had written.

Dear Natalie,

I never imagined that I would fall in love again but I have.  I knew that I loved you the first time we met.  I tried to fight it not because I found out that you’re Darnell’s sister.  I forgave Darnell for being responsible for Jody’s death.  It wasn’t easy because it was his reckless driving which resulted in her death but God helped me to get over the bitterness I was feeling toward your brother and to come to the place where I could not only find it in my heart to forgive him but to share His love with him.  

My healing came from talking to Darnell about God and sharing the Bible with him and as I watched him accept God’s love and forgiveness, it brought a peace to my heart which I hadn’t felt in a long time.  Visiting Darnell was a much of a blessing for me as it was for him.  Then, I met you. 

When you walked into the room, my heart stopped.  I couldn’t believe that another woman could have such an effect on me.  I felt as if I was being unfaithful to Jody’s memory.  Jody was my best friend before she became my wife.  We had known each other since college but didn’t start dating until years later when we were in our thirties.  Two years after we started dating, we got married.  We were married for two and a half years when she died.   I had lost my wife and my best friend.  We had planned to have children but that dream died with Jody.

Falling in love again was not something I imagined would happen and when it did, I tried to fight it.  You stirred in me feelings and passions that I have never experienced in my life–not even with Jody and that scared me.  I wanted you so much that it was all I could think about.  And when I realized that you were attracted to me too, it was only a matter of time before we became lovers.  

Loving you has consumed me to the point where I have turned my back on what I know to be right and acceptable in God’s sight.  As a man of faith, I can’t continue to be in a relationship with a woman I am not married to.  It goes against what I believe.  I have to choose between my love for you and my faith.  It pains me to do this but I must choose my faith.  By the time you read this letter, I will be out of the country.  

We cannot attempt to see each other anymore.  Please believe me when I say that I love you and will always love you.   Sometimes doing the right thing hurts but in the end, we have to be able to live with ourselves.

Andrew

“Oh, Natalie,” he moaned under his breath, aching for her.   Life without her was going to be unbearable.

Natalie read the note again, the tears streaming down her face.   She hadn’t seen this coming.  She thought they were happy but when she read the note, she realized that how hard it was for him to go against his religious convictions.  She herself came from a Christian family and had been taught that sex outside of marriage was wrong.  She had drifted from her faith, not going to church as often as she should.  Her makeup and choice in clothes were evidence that she was not as devout when it came to religion as the rest of her family but after meeting Andrew, those things had changed.  She had stopped wearing the makeup and had opted for the more natural look and her wardrobe had changed too.  And she had begun to read her Bible more lately.  She even began going back to church and then this morning she found this note.

Thankfully, it was a Sunday morning and she didn’t have to worry about going to work.  There was no way that she would have been able to function.  Heartbroken and depressed she didn’t even feel like getting out of bed.

When Andrew got to Heathrow, his brother was waiting for him.  He went up to him and after hugging him, said to him, “I know that this is going to sound crazy, but I must return to Detroit.  There’s a woman there whom I am going to ask to marry me.”

Stuart stared at him.  “Are you serious?  You just got here and now you’re going to leave?”

“Yes!  I’m been an utter fool.  I can’t believe that I didn’t think of this before.  I walked out of her life when I could have asked her to marry me.”

“Does she love you?”

“Yes and I love her.”

“Then, go to her.  I’ll explain everything to the folks.  I’m happy that you have found someone after losing Jody.  I wish you all the best, Andy.”

“Thanks, Stuart.”  They hugged again and then Stuart left.

Andrew found his way to the departure terminal where he booked the next available flight to Detroit.

The following evening, Natalie was sitting on the sofa, despondent when the doorbell rang.  She was not in the mood for seeing anyone but she got and went to answer the door.  Her eyes widened when she saw Andrew standing there.  Opening the door at once, she exclaimed, “What are you doing here?”

“Where’s the note I wrote you?” he asked as he stepped inside the foyer.

She closed and locked the door behind him before she reached into the pocket of her dressing-gown and handed the note to him.  He tore it up.  “Why did you do that?” she asked, bewildered.

“It doesn’t matter anymore,” he told her.  “I was a fool to write it in the first place and I was a bigger fool for walking out of your life.  I love you, Natalie and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.  Marry me.”

She gaped at him.  “Marry you?” she repeated, her heart thudding.  He looked dead serious.

“Yes.  Let’s get married on Saturday.  We’ll go and get the ring today.”

Her mind was spinning at this turn of events.  Just a few moments ago, she felt as if her world had been pulled out from under her and here, she was on the verge of being blissfully happy.  “Are you sure?” she asked.

“Yes, I’ve never been surer of anything in my life.  Today we get engaged and on Saturday we get married.  In between that time, you and I have to abstain.  We will not make love until we are on our honeymoon.”

Her heart bursting, she put her arms around his neck.  “I love you, Andrew Clarke and I will marry you.”

His arms slipped around her waist and he held her tightly against him, his eyes darkening on her upturned face.  “I’m sorry it had to take a plane ride to London to make me realize that marrying you is the right and best thing to do.”

She smiled.  “And this is a decision that we can both live with.”