The Heart Matters

Things weren’t working out as Gina had hoped. Yes, they were sleeping in the same bed but, whenever she tried to make a move on him, he would roll on to his side with his back turned to her. Hurt and frustrated, she would lie there and stare at his naked back, aching to touch him again but afraid of being spurned again. She wasn’t used to any man rejecting her, least of all, Matt.

Last night, after she slipped under the covers, naked she turned on her side, facing him. He was lying on his back. He was shirtless. She ran her hand over his broad chest. He had such an amazing body. She felt her own respond. Now she didn’t want to have sex because she was desperate to get pregnant again so that he wouldn’t suspect that she had a miscarriage but she wanted to enjoy what was rightfully and legally hers.

He took her hand and moved it away. “We’re just supposed to be sleeping together, remember?”

“Yes, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have sex too.”

“Do you really think sex is going to solve our marital problems?”

“I didn’t say that it would but, we are still married and lovemaking is something that husbands and wives are supposed to be doing with each other. It’s one way for them to bond.”

“Lovemaking is more than a physical act, Gina. It’s emotional. The two people have to be emotionally connected and we aren’t.”

“You know there was a time when I didn’t have to beg for sex. You were always so ready and willing.”

“That was a long time ago. Things have changed a lot since then.”

“Are we ever going to have sex again?” she demanded, glaring at him.

“I don’t know.” He suddenly threw off the covers and sat up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed.

Alarmed, she asked, “Where are you going?”

“I’m going to sleep in the guestroom,” he said, standing up. “I don’t think sleeping in the same bed is a good idea.”

“Why? Is it because I wanted to have sex with my husband?”

“No. It isn’t that.”

“What is it then?”

“Gina, I’m really too tired to talk about this right now.”

“What about what the Bible says about husbands and wives not denying each other sex?”

“What about it?”

“You’re denying me and that’s not right.”

“Look, I’m sorry that you think I’m denying you your needs but sex is never any good when one’s heart isn’t in it.”

“So, you’re saying that if you and I were to have sex, your heart wouldn’t be in it?”

“Yes.”

Tears sprang to her eyes. “I bet if it were Melania lying here right now in this bed instead of me, you wouldn’t be standing there. You would be in it having sex with her, wouldn’t you? And don’t bother to deny it, Matt. I know that she’s the reason why you don’t want to have sex with me. Damn her and damn you.”

She got up from the bed and furiously pulled on her robe. She marched to the door and wrenched it open. “Don’t bother sleeping in the guestroom. That’s where I’ll be.” And she left.

Matt stood there, staring at the ajar door. He hated to admit it but it was true what Gina said. If it had been Melania in the bed with him instead of her, they would have been making love right now. And his heart, mind and every fiber of his being would have been in it.

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