This week a group of friends and I were at a bridal shower for our only single friend, Monica, when the subject of having sex with your husband or boyfriend during menstruation came up. I was curious to hear what everyone had to say about it because my husband, David and I have been talking about it lately. We’re both Christians and we have read several scriptures in the Bible where it makes it very clear that it’s not a good time for couples to have sex. The woman is considered unclean and anyone or anything she touches during that time becomes unclean too. David and I usually skip having sex during my period.
I’ve always wondered what it would be like, though. It’s hard being around my gorgeous and sexy man and not being able to have intercourse with him for five days although we do find other ways to enjoy each other. So, now I’m curious to find out what my friends have to say about having sex during my period and if there are any benefits.
“I’ve had period sex,” Dawn announced.
Julie looked taken aback. “You have?” she exclaimed. “What about John? Doesn’t he have a problem with it?”
“Oh, no. He’s fine with it.”
“Doesn’t it get messy?” Ann asked, making a face.
“We do it on my light days. And we always place some towels under me to protect the sheets and mattress and I like to keep tissues nearby so that I can wipe yourself when we’re done.”
“Frank and I have sex in the shower which helps with the mess factor,” Wendy said. “Try that next time, Dawn.”
“Yes, doing it in the shower is much better,” Julie agreed.
“I find that having sex during my period gives me relief from cramps,” Heather informed them. “I didn’t want to do it at first because it seemed so gross but Richard told me that he had read somewhere that it helps with cramps and I used to have bad ones. So, I agreed to try it and I’m happy I did. While we are having sex, I’m so focused on the act itself that I don’t notice any discomfort. So, I would recommend it if you have bad cramps.”
“It relieves my migraines,” Laura said. “In the past, I used to avoid having sex during my attacks but I read online that many women who have sex said that it partially or completely relieved their headaches. I guess I don’t have to tell you how thrilled Ben was.” We all laughed. Laura was always saying that Ben had a libido that rivaled Casanova’s.
“It sounds like it has been a good experience for each of you,” Tanya said.
“Yes,” Dawn replied. “I find it extremely enjoyable.”
“I want to try it but I’m not sure,” Tanya said. “The Bible says that a woman’s unclean during that time and if her husband touches her, he becomes unclean too.”
“Have you talked about it with Calvin?”
“Yes and he doesn’t have a problem with it but he said that we would do it only if I was comfortable.”
“Well, it’s up to you but as far as I know the uncleanness of a woman during her period was all part of the ceremonial laws put in place for the Jewish nation after they left Egypt. That law doesn’t apply to us.”
“I, personally wouldn’t do it because it sounds gross,” Ann said. “And I know that Peter wouldn’t go for it either.”
It was a relief to see that I wasn’t the only one who hadn’t done it or had reservations about it.
“You’re very quiet, Hannah,” Dawn said to me. “What about you and that fine looking man of yours?”
“We’ve talked about it.”
“Girl, how did you manage to snag him?” Dawn asked. I always felt like she resented me because of David. When she first met him, she couldn’t stop staring at him even though her boyfriend, John was standing right there. John was Korean.
“God blessed me,” I replied.
“Yes, God blessed you with David like he blessed me with Zack,” Monica said, glowing.
“You know if I weren’t with John, I would have moved in on David.”
“You wouldn’t have stood a chance,” Ann told her. “Anyone can see how much in love he is with Hannah.”
And so, the topic went from having period sex to David and me until it was time to open the presents. “Don’t let Dawn get to you,” Tanya advised me. “She’s just jealous. It’s fine for her to be with an Asian man but she has a huge problem with a black man being with an Asian woman.”
“I feel sorry for John,” I said. “He’s such a sweet guy.”
“Maybe one of these days, he will wise up and dump her.” It was obvious that Tanya didn’t like Dawn. Perhaps it had to do with the fact that Calvin used to date Dawn until she broke up with him.
It was after eight when I finally got home and I was relieved. As much as I loved my friends, I could only take them in small doses. David was in the living-room watching television. I sat down on the sofa next to him after we kissed, I told him about the discussion on period sex. “Would you like us to try it?” he asked.
“I’m not sure. Everyone who has said it was good and had benefits. Tanya’s considering it but Ann is totally opposed to it.”
“Baby, it’s what you want to do.”
“I’ll think about it and read up more about it as well.”
“And if you decide that it isn’t something you want to do, that’s fine. It doesn’t matter if most of your friends have done it. It’s whatever makes you comfortable.”
I suddenly stood up. “Let’s go to bed,” I said, looking down at him.
He stared up at me. “It’s still a bit early to call it a night, isn’t it?”
“I didn’t said anything about sleep,” I replied, giving him a knowing smile.
He was on his feet in a heartbeat and pulling me towards the bedroom.