Pining For Her

“Are you all right?” Vanessa asked him as he sat up and dragged his fingers through his hair.

“Yes, I’m fine,” he lied. “I’m just a bit tired.” That was true. He hadn’t gotten much sleep and when he did, he had dreamt about the first time he met Rhoda. Oh, Rhoda…

“Breakfast is on the table for you. I’m heading out. I have to errands to run and then, I’m heading over to the banquet hall to help with getting things ready for this evening. I can’t believe that my parents are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary.” She went over and kissed him on the lips while ruffling his hair. “You look so sexy right now. If I didn’t have to go…I’ll see you later. I should be back by five. Bye’ Querido.”

He mumbled something and as soon as she was gone, he fell back against the pillows. He squinted at the sun streaming through the windows. He felt terrible. He hadn’t slept well and when he managed to, he dreamed about Rhoda.

Rhoda…he closed his eyes in despair. It had been almost a month since she broke up with him. It was torture not seeing or being with her. He missed her like crazy. He had called and texted her several times but she never replied. He was out of his mind with jealousy, thinking of her with Michael.

He sat up and reached for his cell and checked for messages but there weren’t any. He hit the speed dial button. To his surprise, she answered. “Darius, you have to stop calling and texting me.”

It felt so good to hear her voice. “I miss you,” he muttered thickly. “I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I can’t think…Rhoda, I need to see you.”

“It’s over between us. You’re a married man and it’s wrong for us to be together. Please try to understand.”

“All I understand right now is that I love you and I want to be with you.”

“Darius, you’re not making this easy for me.”

“I don’t want to make it easy for you and I don’t want to continue like this. I think about you all the time, wondering how you are and what you’re doing. I had a dream about you last night. It was about the first time we met. That day my life was completely changed. I don’t even want to remember what it was like before you walked into it.”

“My life changed that day too but what we had is over, Darius. You have a wife and-and I have a boyfriend. I don’t want to hurt either of them.”

“I don’t want to hurt them either but this hurts, Rhoda. Hearing your voice, talking to you and not being able to see you or to touch you…This is torture for me.”

“Darius, I can’t do this!” She sounded tearful. “I have to go. Please don’t call or text me anymore.” And she hung up.

He sat there for a long time, holding the cell in his hand, his heart breaking. What was he going to do now? How long was he expected to continue like this? Vanessa didn’t suspect anything as yet but it was only a matter of time. The last thing he wanted to do was to hurt her. Never once while they were married did he ever look at another woman let alone cheat on her but when he saw Rhoda, his marriage and Vanessa were the last things on his mind. When he was with Rhoda nothing else mattered.

He could still remember the first time they made love. It was a Thursday evening and after dinner they decided to go for a walk on a deserted beach. The sun was setting over the gentle waves. They walked along the water’s edge, bare feet and holding hands. Then, he stopped and turned her around to face him. As she gazed up at him, he cupped her face between his hands and kissed her. Things soon heated up and they were frantically removing their clothes. And there on the wet sand, bathed in the orange glow of the sun, they made love. His body reacted to the memory and muttering under his breath, he got up from the bed. He stumbled into the bathroom and took a cold shower.

It was after six when Vanessa got home. “The traffic was a bit heavy,” she said as she rushed about the bedroom, getting her things together to take a shower. She laid her dress out on the bed. “I won’t be long.”

“What time do we need to be there?” he asked. He really didn’t feel like going. He would have preferred to stay home.

“Seven. Seven-thirty the latest. My parents are supposed to be there for seven forty-five. Dinner is at eight. What do you think of my dress?”

He glanced at it. “It looks great. I’m sure you will do it justice.”

She smiled. “Thanks, Querido.” She reached up and kissed him on the lips before she hurried into the bathroom. When she returned, he was dressed. Her gaze traveled appreciatively over him. “You look gorgeous,” she remarked.

He forced a smile. “Thank you. I’ll be in the living-room.”

Vanessa watched him go, her brow knitted. He didn’t seem like his usual self. When they got home later, she would ask him what was troubling him.

“Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral” – Hebrews 13:4. Marriage is a holy covenant between a man and his wife. Adultery is the breaking of that covenant.

The sequel for this story is The Shocking Discovery.