Dating

You may wonder if the Bible says anything about dating.  It doesn’t directly, but there are guidelines that can apply to your situation.

The first thing you do is pray about it.  God knows best and He knows people.  He will know right off the bat who would be a good match for you and whom you should avoid like the plague.

If you are a Christian, you should date one.  The Bible tells us not to team up with those who are unbelievers (2 Corinthians 6:14, TLB).  It is important to know that it is not enough that the person is a Christian.  Not everyone who says he or she is a Christian is one.  They may be in name only but not in practice.  Paul warns us about this, “you are not to associate with anyone who claims to be a Christian yet indulges in sexual sin, or is greedy, or worships idols, or is abusive, or a drunkard, or a swindler. Don’t even eat with such people” (1 Corinthians 5:11).  And that is why when you pray about a potential mate ask God for one who loves Him.  You want a godly mate.   Believe it or not, you want someone who would put God before you.  You want someone who loves God more than you.

Don’t let anyone pressure you into doing what you don’t want to do.  The Bible tells us to “run from anything that stimulates youthful lust.  Follow anything that makes you want to do right. Pursue faith and love and peace, and enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts” (2 Timothy 2:22).

Dating should not include a sexual relationship.  “But our bodies were not made for sexual immorality. They were made for the Lord, and the Lord cares about our bodies.  Run away from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.  Or don’t you know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honour God with your body” (1 Corinthians 6:13, 18-20).  Don’t do something you will later regret.

Date someone who has a positive attitude, encourages you and is supportive.  Make sure you both want the same things.  I have heard of horror stories about couples who get married and never discussed having children.  The woman learns too late that her new husband does not want to be a father.  If your relationship is serious and you know that this is the person you want to marry, put everything out on the table.  You definitely don’t want any surprises after you are married.

Take things slowly—let the relationship progress slowly.  Get to know one another.  Take your time.  There is no rush.  Successful relationships take time and effort.  They need to be cultivated.  Don’t allow your relationship to consume so much of your time that you exclude others.  Don’t think only about your own affairs, but be interested in others, too, and what they are doing (Philippians 2:4).

Dating is fun if it is done responsibly and with God’s blessing.  God wants us to enjoy healthy and loving relationships.  God has someone for you.  Just as He matched Adam up with Eve who was suitable for him, He will do the same for you.  Just be patient and wait on Him.

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