Body Language

I was reading Decoding Women’s Body Language, an article on the Ask Men website about women’s body language.  There are non-verbal ways in which they show that they are interested in men such as leaning toward the men they are trying to attract and frequently making eye contact. They laugh more often than usual and smile constantly, regardless of whether or not the men they are interesed in are funny.  They chew on their lips and their faces become more animated. 

The more flirtatious women tend to fidget more, doing things like fiddling with their jewelry, twisting rings and tugging at necklaces because they are nervous and excited.  Their hearts are beating a little faster than usual, they need some sort of outlet for their tension.  Apparently, they may also play with their hair or place their hands on themselves in some small but unusual way, which is an unconscious signal that they wish the object of their desire was touching them that way.

My husband once told me about a man who approached a woman at a function and asked her for a dance.  She readily got up and went with him, leaving her husband and child sitting there.  What gave this man the courage to approach this married woman?  Was it her body language?  Did she frequently make eye contact with him?  Did she give him the “I’m interested” signal?

How did her husband feel seeing her dance with a stranger?  I wonder if they are still together.  When a woman is in a committed relationship there should be no reason for another man to even contemplate moving in on her.  This is a boundary no one should cross.  The woman has to make it clear that she is not available and she needs to do this with her body language.  It’s no point saying that she’s not interested and yet, she is telling the man the opposite with her body.

Just recently my husband and I watched “Duel in the Sun” with Jennifer Jones, Gregory Peck and Joseph Cotten.   The woman thought that Jesse, the good brother was a better choice for her but even though she said she hated him, she was attracted to the bad brother.  And he knew it.  Even though she attempted to fight him off, her body language made it clear that she wanted him and that was why he continued to make advances toward her.  I have seen so many stories where women adamantly deny that they have feelings for certain men but in the end it turns out that they were just kidding themselves. 

I will admit that initially, I fought against my attraction for my husband because at the time I was in what I thought was a relationship.  My husband was persistent.  He was completely opposite to the man I was involved with and it wasn’t long before I ended my previous relationship. 

My husband told me that he once attended a party with an ex-girlfriend.  A man approached her and she was chatting with him.  Based on her body language my husband decided to get up and leave her there.  He doesn’t know how she got home.  That was the end of their relationship. 

Women who are in committed relationships have no business chatting with other men who can be very subtle in their approach.  Not all of them make it clear that they are fishing.  Some of them can be disarming so women have to be discerning. 

Here are a couple of tips on what to do if you find yourself in a sticky situation with another man:

    1. When you are around someone you may be attracted to, act as if your husband is right there beside you.
    2. Shut down the communication immediately.   Let the person know that you are not interested in talking to him.

Keep in mind that not all men who are friendly towards you are trying to score.  They might just be trying to socialize and nothing more.  You have to be able to know the difference and then respond appropriately. 

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One response to “Body Language

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