Feeding Frenzy

Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy. —Matthew 5:7

People who study sharks tell us that they are most likely to attack when they sense blood in the water. The blood acts as a trigger to their feeding mechanism and they attack, often in a group, creating a deadly feeding frenzy. Blood in the water marks the vulnerability of the target.

Sadly, this is sometimes how people in the church respond to those who are hurting. Instead of being a community where people are loved, cared for, and nurtured, it can become a dangerous environment where predators are looking for the “blood in the water” of someone’s failings or faults. And then the feeding frenzy is on.

Instead of kicking people when they are down, we should be offering the encouragement of Christ by helping to restore the fallen. Of course, we’re not to condone sinful behavior, but our Lord calls us to display mercy. He said, “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy” (Matt. 5:7). Mercy has been described as not getting what we deserve, and we all deserve eternal judgment. The same God who shows us mercy in Christ calls us to show mercy to one another.

So when we see “blood in the water,” let’s seek to show mercy. The day may come when we will want someone to show mercy to us!

Lord, help us to be merciful
To those who fall in sin,
Remembering You rescued us
And cleansed us from within. —Sper

We can stop showing mercy to others
when Christ stops showing mercy to us.

Source:  Our Daily Bread

I met a young woman at a Women’s shelter’s open house.  She was a volunteer.  She told me that she was a single mother and used to attend a church.   She left the church because the members made her feel unwelcome because she had a child outside of marriage.  She joined another church of a different denomination.

I was shocked to hear about her experience. I couldn’t believe that they could be so unloving and unforgiving.  I’m sure that she wasn’t asking them to condone what she had done.  Pregnancy outside of marriage is not God’s will.  I think about the woman caught in adultery.  The people condemned her.  They wanted to stone her to death.  Jesus called them on their hypocrisy.  He told them that if there was any person among them who never committed any sins, he could throw the first stone.  Of course, there was no such person. They all had to back off.  They left Jesus and the woman alone.  Jesus didn’t condemn her.  He didn’t condone or excuse her sin but He showed her mercy.  It’s the same with the prodigal son.  His father didn’t condone or excuse his actions but he showed him love.  He forgave him.  He didn’t condemn him.  He didn’t make him feel bad.

If you are going through a similar situation, know that you are not alone.  Let these words of Psalm 3:3 give you strength.

But thou, oh Lord are a shield for me

My glory and the lifter of my head

Thou, oh Lord are shield for me
My glory and the lifter of my head

Don’t let the negative response of others shake your faith.  Hold on to that faith and the God who is your Rock.  Cling to Him until the feeding frenzy subsides.

Gabrielle Giffords

Just recently I saw a news clip of Gabrielle Giffords and was amazed at the progress she has made.  She is a survivor and a fighter.

I didn’t know anything about Gabrielle Giffords until the shooting which was reported to be an assassination attempt on her at a supermarket where she was meeting publicly with constituents.  She was critically injured by a gunshot wound to the head; thirteen people were injured and six others were killed in the shooting, among them conservative federal judge John Roll.  Giffords was taken to rehabilitation facility in Houston, Texas, where she recovered some of her ability to walk, speak, read and write.

Why was there an attempt on her life?  The suspect in her shooting was Jared Lee Loughner who began to exhibit unusual behavior a year before the incident.  According to an old friend, Bryce Tierney, Loughner had exhibited a longstanding dislike for Gabrielle Giffords, a Blue Dog Democrat, stating that women should not hold positions of power. He repeatedly derided Giffords as a “fake”. This belief intensified after he attended her August 25, 2007 event when she did not, in his view, sufficiently answer his question: “What is government if words have no meaning?” (Loughner kept Giffords’ form letter, which thanked him for attending the 2007 event, in the same box as an envelope which was scrawled with phrases like “die bitch” and “assassination plans have been made”.)  On January 8, 2011 he carried out his plan.  Gabrielle Giffords was shot in the head outside of a  Safeway grocery store in Casas Adobes, Arizona, a suburban area northwest of Tucson, during her first “Congress on Your Corner” gathering of the year.

On the same day, doctors performed emergency surgery to extract skull fragments and a small amount of necrotic tissue from her brain. The bullet had passed through Giffords’ head without crossing the midline of the brain, where the most critical injuries typically result. Part of her skull was removed to avoid further damage to the brain from pressure caused by swelling. Doctors who first treated Giffords said the bullet had entered the back of her head and exited through the front of her skull, but physicians later concluded that it had traveled in the opposite direction.  Upon receiving the news from a staffer, husband Mark E. Kelly and his daughters flew in a friend’s aircraft directly from Houston to Tucson.

Giffords began her recovery and by mid-January she began simple physical therapy, including sitting up with the assistance of hospital staff and moving her legs upon command. President Obama visited her on January 12 at the medical center and publicly stated in an evening memorial ceremony that she had “opened her eyes for the first time” that day.  On January 15, surgeons performed a tracheotomy, replacing the ventilator tube with a smaller one inserted through Giffords’ throat to assist independent breathing. Ophthalmologist Lynn Polonski surgically repaired Giffords’ damaged eye socket, with additional reconstructive surgery to follow.

Giffords’ condition was upgraded to “serious” on January 17, and to “good” on January 25. She was transferred on January 21 to the Memorial Hermann Medical Center in Houston, Texas, where she subsequently moved to the center’s Institute for Rehabilitation and Research (TIRR) to undergo a program of physical therapy, occupational therapy and speech therapy. Medical experts’ initial assessment in January was that Giffords’ recovery could take from several months to more than one year. Upon her arrival in Houston, her doctors were optimistic, saying she has “great rehabilitation potential”.

Giffords underwent cranioplasty surgery on May 18, 2011, to replace part of her skull that had been removed in January to permit her brain to swell after the gunshot to her head. Surgeons replaced the bone, using tiny screws, with a piece of molded hard plastic; they expect that her skull will eventually fuse with the plastic’s porous material. At that point, Giffords no longer needed to wear the helmet that she had been wearing to protect her brain from further injury.   On June 9, 2011, Giffords’ aide Pia Carusone announced that while Giffords’ comprehension appeared to be “close to normal, if not normal,” she was not yet using complete sentences. On June 12, two photos of Giffords taken on May 17 were released, the first since the shooting. On June 15, Giffords was released from the hospital to return home, where she continued speech, music, physical and occupational therapy.

On August 1, Giffords made her first public appearance on the House floor to vote in favor of raising the debt limit ceiling.  She was greeted with standing ovation and accolades from her fellow members of Congress.  A Giffords spokesman, Mark Kimble, stated in August 2011 that the congresswoman was walking without a cane and writing with her left hand, as she did not have full use of her right side.  Her husband Mark wrote a memoir which was released in November 2011.  In Gabby: A Story of Courage and Hope, he reported that Giffords vows to return to Congress, although she continues to struggle with language and has lost 50 percent of her vision in both eyes.

On January 22, 2011, she announced that she intended to resign her seat by the end of the week. Giffords stated in a video released about the decision that she was resigning so that she could continue to focus on her recovery.  She formally submitted her resignation on 25 January, with the letter of her resignation being tearfully read on her behalf by fellow Democratic representative Debbie Wasserman Schultz accompanied by Giffords, Arizona Republican Congressman Jeff Flake (who sat with and assisted Giffords during the State of the Union address) and several other legislators on the floor.  She attended President Obama’s State of Union address on January 24 and received a standing ovation.

Giffords is the third woman in Arizona’s history to be elected to the U.S. Congress. Considered a ”Blue Dog” Democrat, her stances on health care reform and illegal immigration were sources of attention for those opposed to her candidacy and have made her a recipient of criticism from various conservative groups. She has described herself as a “former Republican.”

This is what others had to say about Giffords:

Gabby Giffords was a friend of mine. She is not only an extraordinary public servant, but she is also somebody who is warm and caring. She is well liked by her colleagues and well liked by her constituents.” – President Obama

Congresswoman Giffords is a brilliant and courageous Member of Congress, bringing to Washington the views of a new generation of national leaders. It is especially tragic that she was attacked as she was meeting with her constituents whom she serves with such dedication and distinction - Minority Leader of the United States House of Representatives Nancy Pelosi

My sister-in-law, Gabrielle Giffords, is a kind, compassionate, brilliant woman, loved by friends and political adversaries alike – a true patriot: What is going on in our country that such a good person can be the subject of such senseless violence? It’s a sad day – Astronaut Scott Kelly

Gabby’s got a long road ahead of her. We know that the recovery from these [kinds] of injuries isn’t measured in days and weeks. It’s more like weeks and months. … But, you know, she’s a really, really tough woman – Mark Kelly, Giffords’ husband

Notes to Women salutes this woman whose fighting spirit has enabled her to make the remarkable recovery she has.  We wish her all the best as she focuses on making a full recovery.

My position is to listen to my constituents, learn from the best information available and ultimately make sound, rational decisions that are going to be beneficial to the people of the 8th Congressional District.

Our country must be strong enough to solve problems, and that means we must learn how to work together again.

But the safety of the world, in some sense, depends on your saying “no” to inhumane ideas. Standing up for one’s own integrity makes you no friends. It is costly. Yet defiance of the mob, in the service of that which is right, is one of the highest expressions of courage I know.

Gabrielle Giffords

Sources: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gabrielle_Giffords; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jared_Lee_Loughner; http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Gabrielle_Giffords

Wise Up

Proverbs 24:3-4

Additional Scripture Readings: Joshua 24:15; Proverbs 2:1-6

When we think of the wise, we might picture esteemed scholars padding through hallowed halls of learning. In their hushed offices and remote library stacks, they seem to have a monopoly on wisdom and understanding.

But where does wisdom really come from? How do moms like you and me wise up?

From living life well. Wisdom grows when moms and dads make careful choices about their priorities and the amount of time they spend with their children. It arises when arguments are settled with sane solutions and siblings are coaxed to peace. It develops when families work together to squeeze extras from meager incomes. It blossoms when celebrations mark special achievements. Most of all, wisdom comes from living all of life’s days with an attitude of desiring and working toward God’s best in our families.

Wisdom doesn’t necessarily come from hallowed halls of learning. Sure, learned folks are smart enough. But the truly wise are those who learn to live life well, day in and day out.

Source:  NIV Devotions for Moms

Wisdom is appreciating the simple things in life and giving thanks for God who made it possible.  Things such as watching my husband and son play together; reading to our son; sitting in the chair and watching one of his favorite shows on Disney Junior with him; praying with him.  Sometimes I just watch him and catch myself smiling at the realization that I’m a Mom.

I agree that wisdom is managing to make a little money go a long way.  There have been times when we had to cut back and just get the essentials in order to save money.  Wisdom is finding ways to have fun without spending money we don’t have.

Wisdom is putting our priorities in order–God, family, friends, work.  Too often we get them mixed up.  We put work and interests first and our relationships with God and our families suffer.  Wisdom is finding time for God who always has time for us.  Wisdom is making time for your spouse.  Wisdom is giving your child your time and attention now while you still can because one day that will change.  Wisdom is living your life to the fullest and as best as you can so that you don’t look back and have regrets.

Wise up. Live your life one day at a time.  Don’t waste time worrying about things you can’t change.  Change the things you can.  Celebrate life.  Spend quality time with God and your loved ones.

CALL FOR NOMINATIONS

Do you have or you know someone with inspiring ideas and solutions to deliver for girls and women?  If so, here’s a great opportunity for you.

Every year, in conjunction with International Women’s Day, Women Deliver celebrates the progress made on behalf of girls and women worldwide. Our Women Deliver 100 list in 2011, which featured 100 of the most inspiring people who have delivered for girls and women, was covered by over 100 traditional and new media sources. This year, to continue the momentum, we are spotlighting the top 50 inspiring ideas and solutions that deliver for girls and women. We would love to hear what you think are the most innovative, impactful, and promising advancements in overcoming gender inequality.

These advancements could have been made by an individual, governments, the private sector, or civil society, but they must have helped to improve the condition of girls and women around the world, in one or more of the following 5 categories:

•    Technologies and Innovations
•    Educational Initiatives
•    Health Modernization
•    Advocacy and Awareness Campaigns
•    Leadership and Empowerment Programs

Examples of inequities that the solutions may have addressed include, but are not limited to: Violence Against Women; Sex Trafficking; Child Marriage; Political Processes; Maternal Health; Sexual and Reproductive Health and Rights; HIV/AID; Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Rights; Economic Inequity; or Female Genital Mutilation.

SUBMIT A NOMINATION NOW!
NOMINATIONS MUST BE RECEIVED NO LATER THAN FEBRUARY 10, 2012.

Once all nominations have been received, a selection committee of experts and advocates from leading global NGOs and foundations will choose 25 per category, with the final Top 50 chosen by online voting. The winners from each category will be featured prominently on Women Deliver’s website, through the selection committee’s social media portals, and at the Women Deliver 2013 conference in Kuala Lumpur.

Submit your ideas and solutions and share how they have delivered for girls and women and you could very well be one of the 50 chosen and featured on Women’s Deliver website.

Notes to Women wishes all the nominees the best.

A drop in the bucket

ONE is a grassroots advocacy and campaigning organization that fights extreme poverty and preventable disease, particularly in Africa, by raising public awareness and pressuring political leaders to support smart and effective policies and programs that are saving lives, helping to put kids in school and improving futures. Cofounded by Bono and other campaigners, ONE is nonpartisan and works closely with African activists and policy makers.

I received the following email from a member of ONE concerned that there will be cuts to programs which provide aid to millions of people living in poverty.  I encourage you to read it.

As a Canadian I’m proud that our foreign aid achieves amazing results, saving lives and helping millions of people to lift themselves out of poverty.

Last year alone we provided food aid to 105 million people, and put 21 million children in school feeding programs. We trained over 20,000 health care workers in developing countries. In Bangladesh, Canadian assistance provided polio vaccinations to 69,000 infants. And in Senegal, Canadian support trained over 8,000 teachers.

But this amazing work is now at risk with discussions taking place to cut these life saving programs.

Please join me and sign ONE’s petition:
http://act.one.org/go/283?akid=2828.2259320.PKltua&t=3

The petition reads:Dear Prime Minister Harper,
As you make what are difficult choices for the 2012-2013 federal budget, please protect critical international development funding that saves lives and helps the world’s poor pull themselves out of poverty.

Foreign aid is a drop in the bucket in terms of the overall federal budget, less than 2%. But its impact in the world is huge.

Please add your name today and join the more than 8000 other Canadian ONE members who have already taken action:
http://act.one.org/go/283?akid=2828.2259320.PKltua&t=5

Thanks for all you do,
Robyn J. Mitchell, ONE.org

Join ONE in its fight to stop cuts to Canadian foreign aid.  Sign the petition.   Spread the word.  Take action! 

Sarah Burke

On Thursday, January 12th, the world of Freestyle skiing was changed forever when its icon, Sarah Burke died at the young age of 29 in the hospital in Salt Lake City, Utah after sustaining serious injuries in a skiing accident on Tuesday, Jan. 10.  The tragedy occured during a training run in the superpipe at a personal sponsor event at the Park City Mountain resort.   As the result of a fall after completing a jump, she suffered a ruptured vertebral artery, one of the four major arteries supplying blood to the brain. This caused her to go into cardiac arrest. 

She was rushed to hospital where she was put on life support and therapeutic hypothermia was initiated to protect her brain.  She underwent surgery to repair the torn artery on Wednesday, January 11th and was in a medically induced coma until she died the following day.  Sarah had sustained irreversible brain damage which resulted in her heart stopping.  She died surrounded by her loved ones.  She leaves behind her husband and fellow skier, Rory Bushfield. 

At her request, Sarah’s organs and tissues were donated to save the lives of others.  Canada’s women’s soccer team observed a moment of silence for Sarah before they played Haiti in an Olympic qualifying match in Vancouver on Thursday night.

I watched the news and was touched when I saw a clip of Sarah’s wedding to Rory.  She was radiant.  The pair looked so happy.  They were young and in love and they believed that they had a wonderful future ahead of them.  One tragic fall changed everything.  Dreams were shattered and a family has suffered a great loss.  And those who knew Sarah will miss her terribly. 

Alpine Canada president Max Gartner issued the following statement on Thursday:  “We are very saddened to learn of Sarah’s passing. On behalf of Alpine Canada, I’d like to extend our sincere sympathies to the family and friends of Sarah and to the freestyle community. The loss of such a great athlete is a tragedy for the entire ski and sport community.”

Sarah was a pioneer of the superpipe event. She was a four-time Winter X Games gold medalist, and won the world championship in the halfpipe in 2005.  She successfully lobbied the International Olympic Committee (IOC) to have the event added to the Olympic program for the 2014 Winter Olympics. She was considered a medal favourite in the event.

Sarah was also a four-time Winter X Games gold medalist in freestyle skiing.  She was the first woman ever to land a jump with 1080-degree rotation in competition.  She won ESPN’s 2001 Award for female skier of the year and was voted 2007′s Best Female Action Sports Athlete at the ESPY awards.

Notes to Women salutes and mourns this remarkable young woman and pioneer of her generation who fought fiercely for the sport she loved and believed in.   She will be remembered at the first ever superpipe event at the 2014 Winter Olympics.  Our thoughts and our prayers are with her husband, Rory, her parents, Jan and Gordon and her sister, Anna. 

A website for donations was set up by Sarah’s agent Michael Spencer, who set a fundraising goal of $550,000 for medical costs and “related expenses.” Thankfully, the family will not have to worry about the financial costs related to Sarah’s care due to the donations that have been pouring in.  In a statement issued through the Canadian Freestyle Ski Association, further contributions will be used to establish a foundation to “honor Sarah’s legacy and promote the ideals she valued and embodied.” If you would like to make donations in Sarah’s name, you may do so at http://www.giveforward.com/sarahburke. 

If you have memories or messages you would like to share, you may do so at http://sarahburkeski.com/remembering-sarah/.

Sources:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sarah_Burke; http://www.cbc.ca/sports/skiing/story/2012/01/19/sp-sarah-burke-obit.html; http://www.ctv.ca/CTVNews/TopStories/20120120/sarah-burke-medical-bills-legacy-120120/#ixzz1kJL55gvl

Slow or Free Range Parenting

Just recently I watched a program about Slow and Free Range parenting.  What exactly is slow parenting?  It is a parenting style in which few activities are organised for children. Instead, they are allowed to explore the world at their own pace. It is a response to concerted cultivation and the widespread trend for parents to schedule activities and classes after school; to solve problems on behalf of the children, and to buy services from commercial suppliers rather than letting nature take its course.

Carl Honoré, a father of two and author of the books In Praise of Slowand Under Pressure, said the idea is to allow young people to largely discover the world for themselves, rather than to force young people into overstructured, overscheduled lifestyles that “turn parenting into a race for perfection.” ”Slow parenting is about bringing a bit of balance back,” he said. “It’s about giving children the time and space to explore their own world at their own pace.”  Over time, Honoré said, the aim is for young people to “work out who they are, rather than who we want them to be.”

The concept of free range parenting came from Columnist Lenore Skenazy, a mother who allowed her 9 year old son to travel alone on the New York subway system and then wrote about the experience in the New York Sun.    Free-range parenting is based on the notion “that we can give our children the same kind of freedom we had [as kids] without going nuts with worry,” Skenazy says. “When you let children out, all the good things happen – the self-confidence, happiness, and self-sufficiency that come from letting our kids do some things on their own,” she says.

Advocates of slow parenting says that this method of parenting allows kids to flourish.  Some of the goals of slow parenting are –

• The central tenet of slow parenting is to let a child be happy and satisfied with their own achievements, whatever they may be; and even though those do not necessarily fall within the commonly understood meaning of the word “achievement”.
• The aim is not to stress a child into doing things aimed at “success” and wealth acquisition and so on. Stress and overstimulation are not good for kids and it is this that slow parenting hopes to reduce.
• Self discovery and ability to take care of themselves are values that this style of parenting hopes to instill in a child.
• Unsupervised play out of doors and close to nature, as far as possible is advisable according to the proponents of slow parenting. Time spent in the natural world is emphasized here.
• When it comes to toys as well, slow parenting has certain recommendations. It is the view commercially manufactured toys are limited in their application, and designed to encourage further purchases, and that they may also limit the imagination and natural exploration of a child. If however you give the child a wooden stick he or she may think of a million different uses for it!
• While many parents take an active interest in children’s play guiding or helping them, slow parenting recommends standing back and letting the child decide what he or she wants to do.
• Most TV programming is considered unsuitable for children under this parenting style.
• The merits of after school classes such as football, ballet, drama, tennis, swimming and art class are questioned by this style of parenting.
• The emphasis placed by parents on safeguarding kids against all risks is also something not advocated by slow parenting since it is thought that a child should be brought up to assess and combat reasonable risks.

Growing up, we played unsupervised.  We played in the yard until it was time to go in the house to have lunch or when it got dark.  We felt safe.  We rode our bikes around the neighborhood with wearing helmets.  We got bruises and scrapes.  We didn’t have television.  We listened to programs on the radio, read a lot.  I was an avid reader and I spent a lot of time with my nose buried in a book or writing short stories.  We were active.  We walked a lot.  Played hopscotch, jumped rope, played Chinese skipping, rode bikes and scooters.  We were allowed to walk to the corner store or to a friend’s house by ourselves.

However, this was over 40 years ago and times were different then.  Our parents didn’t have to worry about pedophiles.  Neighbors kept an eye out for each other and their kids.  We dared not cut classes because we were afraid that our parents would find out.  We never walked home alone or wandered off anywhere by ourselves. Our parents gave us freedom but we were still careful.

I agree that too much TV is not good for kids.  Some parents don’t allow their kids to watch any TV while others only allow them to watch it for 15 minutes a day.  We allow our son to watch TV but we encourage him to do other things like reading, doing some Math and free play.  He enjoys playing with his blocks.  He has a guitar which he loves to play.  I don’t agree that toys limit the imagination and natural exploration of a child.  My child imagines that he is building trains and ships with his blocks.  At daycare he is always constructing something with the lego blocks.  This helps with his hand and eye coordination.  He also plays with hangers, pretending that they are drumsticks.  He has decided that he wants to be a pirate.  I think this has to do with Jake and The Never Land Pirates, a show he watches on Disney Junior.

We teach him not to talk to strangers, or to tell anyone his name or to go with anyone.  He is three and a half years old.  We allow him the freedom that is appropriate for his age.  I believe that there should be a balance.  We give them the freedom to explore but still set boundaries that would keep them safe.  I believe that kids should be free to be kids and play their own way.  There are times when they will learn some lessons the hard way.  For example if you tell them not to do something and explain what will happen if they do and they still go ahead and do it, then they have to deal with the consequences.

Nowadays it seems as if kids are allowed to do whatever they please.  They don’t have boundaries or have very few (if any) rules.  They get to go wherever or do whatever they want.  I remember watching one of those Housewives shows and one of the mothers was called the B word by her daughter.  The daughter told her parents that they never disciplined her.  On another show, this young girl said she had no rules growing up and she was allowed to do whatever she pleased.  She later admitted that she wished there had been rules because they would have made her feel safe.

Children need guidelines–structure, rules.  They need to learn that there are responsibilities, rewards and consequences.  It’s like living in society.  We are free to live our lives as we see fit but there are laws that we need to abide by.  It’s the same with our kids.  They can play, explore and learn with or without supervision but they need to have structure in their lives.  At daycare there is structure–there are rules they have to follow.  They learn to follow instructions, responsibilities, social skills, how to be creative and work in a group and independently.

One of my co-workers allows her son to walk home from school.  He started doing this when he was 10.  She makes sure that he walks where there are lots of people–no shortcuts and that he calls her as soon as he gets home.  I think this is fine.  However, I wouldn’t let my child to ride the subway by himself.  He has to be 13 or older before I would let him do this and he has to be mature enough.  If anything happens, he has to be able to protect himself.  He has to prove that he could take care of himself.

I agree that children are being bombarded with too many activities.  I am amazed at the number of practices some of them have to go to in addition to going to school and doing homework.  They are getting burnt out.  Parents are getting frazzled because they run around getting them to soccer practice, piano lessons or choir practice.  I think two activities are enough and spread out during the week–tennis or soccer or basketball practice on Mondays and swimming or piano or violin lessons on Wednesdays or Thursdays.  Kids should have down time at home reading or doing some activity they enjoy or simply spending quality time with their families.

I don’t know what my child will be interested in doing when he gets older but I will make sure that he is not involved in too many activities.  He will still have his down time.

Whatever method of parenting you choose, is your decision.  Just bear in mind that society is not the same as today as it was in our time.  Kids still need to be kept safe even while they enjoy the freedom of exploring their environment.  A happy balance is the key.

Sources:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slow_parenting; http://www.cbc.ca/news/health/story/2012/01/06/slow-parenting.html; http://www.newbornbabyzone.com/baby-care/slow-parenting/; http://www.cbc.ca/news/yourcommunity/2012/01/should-parents-take-a-more-hands-off-approach-to-raising-their-children.html; http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/parenting/young-children/children-development/article685346.ece

Women and Lung Cancer

Smoking is the No. 1 cause of lung cancer, which causes about 160,000 deaths each year. Yet not all people with lung cancer are, or were, smokers. In fact, 10 to 15 percent of lung cancer deaths are the result of other causes.

Although it was once thought of as a man’s disease, lung cancer in women is ever present. In 2006 statistics showed there were 106,374 men and 90,080 women diagnosed with lung cancer. Lung cancer kills nearly twice as many women as breast cancer; 20% of diagnosed women have never touched a cigarette. 

Lung cancer in women differs from that in men in many ways, including the type of lung cancer most commonly found, the symptoms that are present at the time of diagnosis, and in survival rates at each stage of the disease. Sadly, unlike the recent decrease in the number of lung cancers diagnosed in men, lung cancer in women continues to increase. 

Just recently NFL retiree Chris Draft lost his wife, Lakeasha to the disease just one month after their wedding.  She was only 38 years and a non-smoker.  She was diagnosed with the terminal disease last year according to the Daily Mail, joining the 16,000 to 24,000 Americans who die of lung cancer every year even though they have never smoked. 

A co-worker’s mother-in-law died from lung cancer.  She was not a smoker.  Another co-worker’s mother died from the disease and she too wasn’t a smoker.  Second hand smoke could be the cause.  I remember seeing a PSA of a woman who died lung cancer because she was exposed to it due to her line of work.  I have seen people smoking around babies and young children and fear for their health.   

Why do non-smokers get lung cancer? This is a tough question.  “We’re not sure why,” says Joan Schiller, MD, chief of the division of hematology-oncology and deputy director of the Simmons Comprehensive Cancer Center at the University of Texas-Southwestern Medical Center in Dallas, president and founder of the National Lung Cancer Partnership, and national spokesperson for the American Lung Association. “Radon probably causes a small amount of it. Passive smoke probably causes a small amount of it. The rest of it — we’re just not sure yet,” she says.

Other factors beside smoking which increase the risk of developing lung cancer include exposure to:

• radon
• secondhand smoke
• asbestos
• radiation therapy
• combustion products
• other carcinogens

According to the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency, exposure to radon is the leading cause of lung cancer in non-smokers. Radon gas is a product of decay, and found in almost all rock, soil, and water. It can seep into your home from the soil, usually though cracks and holes in your foundation. When you breathe in radon gas, radioactive particles may remain in your lungs, causing damage that can later lead to lung cancer. There are simple tests to check for radon in the air and water in your home and, if levels are high, “abatement” systems can be installed to filter the radon and lower those levels.

Cooking fumes can be another cause of lung cancer in non-smokers.  Researchers looking at why non-smoking Taiwanese women develop lung cancer suggest an association between the cancer and the fumes created by their cooking food in oil heated to extremely high temperatures.  This one scared me because the other day the smoke was a bit much when I finished frying chicken and I put the pan with the hot oil in the sink.  I should have waited for it to cool down first.  I had to press my face in the crack in the door to breathe in some fresh air. 

Air pollution is another factor.   Ethnicity also could be a risk factor. One study shows that non-smoking African-Americans and Asians who live in Japan and Korea — but not the United States — died more frequently from lung cancer than those of European descent.

What are the signs and symptoms? Lung cancer often doesn’t cause any symptoms in its early stages, however, as the cancer grows, symptoms may include:

• a cough that gets worse or doesn’t go away
• breathing problems, such as shortness of breath or wheezing
• constant chest pain, especially when you cough
• coughing up blood
• a hoarse voice
• frequent chest infections, such as pneumonia, or an infection that doesn’t go away
• fatigue (feeling very tired all the time)
• unexplained weight loss
• loss of appetite

Be aware that other health problems can cause some of the same symptoms and this is why testing is needed to make a diagnosis.

The good news is that a new lung-cancer screening method that uses a CT scanner which holds the promise of catching the disease far sooner–and possibly increasing a woman’s odds of survival. The scanners can provide doctors with a three-dimensional cross section of the lungs, revealing the exact shape and location of internal organs and soft tissue. They can also detect tumors that are the size of a pea. The scans are so accurate that preliminary research conducted at Cornell University found CT screenings could detect early-stage malignancies that conventional chest X-rays missed some 85 percent of the time.

As with most cancers, early detection and healthy diet are key.  There is some evidence suggesting that a diet high in carotenoid-rich foods may help protect against lung cancer in both smokers and non-smokers. 

Here are some tips to reduce your risk of getting lung cancer:

• Quit smoking – NOW
• Listen to Mom, and eat those fruits and veggies!
• Have your home tested for radon.
• Know what you are being exposed to in the workplace.
• Keep away from secondhand smoke.

I was inspired to do this post because of Lakeasha Monique Rutledge Draft who “courageously faced lung cancer, showing us all with every breath that we all need to hold onto life and love with both hands for as long as we can.” 

 

Sources:  http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/01/03/chris-draft-wife-sheds-light-on-lung-cancer-among-non-smokers_n_1181343.html;  http://www.everydayhealth.com/lung-cancer/why-non-smokers-get-lung-cancer.aspx; http://lungcancer.about.com/od/whatislungcancer/a/factsaboutlungcancer.htm; http://www.goodhousekeeping.com/health/womens-health/women-lung-cancer-oct01; http://www.cancer.ca/Canada-wide/About%20cancer/Types%20of%20cancer/Signs%20and%20symptoms%20of%20lung%20cancer.aspx?sc_lang=en#ixzz1jBCmRIzD; http://cancer.about.com/od/lungcancer/tp/preventcancer.htm

Portia Simpson Miller

I recently learned that Jamaica’s current Prime Minister is a woman.   On 29 December 2011 she was elected as Prime Minister of Jamaica for a second time and sworn in at King’s House in Kingston, Jamaica on 5 January 2012.   In her speech to a crowd of 10,000, she announced her plans to break ties with the monarchy.  She had nothing but positive things to say about Queen Elizabeth.  “I love the Queen. She is a beautiful lady, and apart from being a beautiful lady, a wise lady and a wonderful lady.”  However, the time has come to “initiate the process of detachment from the monarchy.”  

Simpson Miller has endorsed replacing the position of the monarchy with an elected head of state.  She is the second head of government to openly endorse republicanism after Percival Patterson.  Simpson Miller has reportedly pledged to transform Jamaica into a republic as part of the fiftieth anniversary of the island’s independence which will be celebrated this year.

Simpson Miller was born on 12 December 1945 in Wood Hall, St. Catherine Parish. She holds a Bachelor of Arts in public administration from Union Institute & University, a private college specialising in distance learning programs. The UIU later awarded her an honorary doctorate of humane letters.  She completed the Executive Programme for Leaders in Development at the prestigious John Kennedy School of Government, HarvardUniversity.

Her political career is just as impressive.   It began in Local Government in 1974 as a Councillor of the Kingston and St. Andrew Corporation (KSAC).  Simpson Miller made the transition to the House of Representatives when she was elected Member of Parliament for South Western St. Andrew in 1976. She was appointed a Parliamentary Secretary in the Office of the Prime Minister in 1977.

Portia Simpson Miller has the distinction of serving as the first female Vice-President of the People’s National Party, a position she held between 1978 and 2006.  She was President of the People’s National Party Women’s Movement from 1983 to 2006. In February 2006, Portia Simpson Miller became the first woman to be elected as head of the People’s National Party.

She took the Oath of Office as Prime Minister on March 30, 2006, becoming the first female head of government of the nation and the third in the Anglophone Caribbean following Eugenia Charles of Dominica and Janet Jagan of Guyana. In appointing her first cabinet following her swearing-in, she also assumed the portfolio of defence minister.  During her first term in office, Simpson Miller formally endorsed civil rights for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender citizens during an election campaign making her the first head of state in Jamaican history to do this. 

Simpson Miller’s love for sports and Jamaican athletes led her to use her influence to motivate the Jamaican sporting community and promote sports as a social unifying force.  In her role as Sports Minister 1989 to 2007, she was instrumental in creating partnerships between government agencies and the private sector, to support sports development inJamaica.  She helped to establish the Sports Development Foundation (SDF) designed to provide financial assistance to national sporting associations, as well as emergency financial assistance to national and international-level athletes.

As Minister of Tourism, Simpson Miller was the leading architect of Jamaica’s Master Plan for Sustainable Tourism Development. The plan sets the strategic policy framework for the expansion of the country’s tourism sector.  She worked to deepen community participation and involve communities in policy decision which led to fundamental reforms in local government and the subsequent establishment of thePortmoreMunicipality, with the election of the first and only directly elected Mayor inJamaicaand the English-speaking Caribbean. 

As Parliamentary representative for the urban constituency of South Western St. Andrew, Simpson Miller has been passionately campaigning on behalf of the poor.  She has also been consistently advocating for urban renewal and community development.  

She was named Person of the Year by The Gleaner and Observer in the Gleaner awards 2011.

On a personal note, Simpson Miller is married to Errald Miller, formerly CEO of Cable & Wireless Jamaica Ltd.  On 29 May 2006 she was vested with the Jamaican Order of the Nation, giving her (and her husband) the style “The Most Honourable” 

Notes to Women congratulates Portia Simpson Miller for her big election victory.  We wish her success as she tackles the country’s economy, debt and unemployment rate.  We hope to celebrate with the people of Jamaica as the nation becomes a republic.

 ”After being tested and tempered, I stand before you today a stronger and better person prepared to be of service to my country and people”

“My administration will work tirelessly that while we try to balance the books we balance people’s lives as well.”

“We will seek to make this country one of brothers and sisters, not of rivals and victims.”

Sources:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Portia_Simpson-Miller; http://www.cbc.ca/news/world/story/2012/01/07/jamaica-monarchy.html; http://www.caribbeanelections.com/knowledge/biography/bios/simpson_miller_portia.asp; http://finance.yahoo.com/news/simpson-miller-sworn-2nd-time-141137213.html

Be True to Yourself

“To Thy own self be true”, the famous words in the play, “Hamlet” came to me recently as I remembered advice God once gave me. He said, “Don’t let the fear of losing someone prevent you from being honest. Be true to yourself.”

I was in a relationship and we wanted different things. I wanted marriage, he didn’t. I continued in the relationship hoping that things would change. I wanted to believe that in time, he would change his mind. I tried to be patient. I tried to be accommodating.  All the while, I was hoping that the relationship would lead to a commitment on his part.

I was settling instead of sticking to what I wanted. God had told me to “be honest. Let him know where you stand. Be true. You owe it to yourself.” I did tell my ex what I wanted and he made it clear what he wanted. I got hurt because I was naive to believe that if I waited long enough, he would realize that he couldn’t live without me and will ask me to marry him. This didn’t happen. I had my head in the clouds but God opened my eyes to the truth. I came crashing down and now my feet are firmly planted on the ground.

God brought me back to reality because He doesn’t want me to settle for anything less than the very best. It has always been my desire to get married and have a family and God didn’t want me to deny myself this. He didn’t want me to continue to hold on to a relationship that was going nowhere. He didn’t want me to lose sight of my dream—of my desire—of myself. He wants the best for me and I should want the same thing. I deserve better than what I was getting from the relationship!

Before you consider leaving the relationship, ask yourself these questions: Can this person live without me? Can I live without the person? Am I giving my best?

By letting go of a relationship that was not for me, I am being true to myself. Somewhere out there is a man who wants the same things I want and when the time is right, God will bring him into my life.

If you are in a relationship that is not going the way you would like it to, let the other person know. Don’t let fear of losing him or her stop you. If the relationship is meant to be it will last. And if not, move on and be glad that you were honest with the other person, letting them know exactly where you stand.

Letting go of someone you love or really care about is hard but in the long run you will be relieved you did—especially if there is someone far better out there for you. Remember, “This above all: to thine ownself be true. And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man.” Do not fool yourself or the other person into believing that you are happy with the relationship as it is. Be true to yourself and to the other person. It is better to lose the other person than to lose yourself in the person.

Years later after writing this devotional, God answered my prayers. He brought someone into my life–a wonderful man who wants to spend the rest of his life with me. We are the proud parents of the adorable son God blessed us with.

Don’t settle.  Don’t feel pressured to jump into a relationship or to hold on to one that is not going anywhere because you are afraid of ending up alone.  Wait on the Lord who desires to give you His best.  Remember, good things come to those who wait.